New Lows

(As previously posted on Tumblr)

It is amazing how things get started and then spread like wildfire.  What is even more amazing is that things that are bad, troublesome, irritating, flagitious – pick one - have such a great proclivity towards wildfire-like tendencies.  Although it is something small, given how large the world is and the matters of greater importance that are going on, there is something that has come to trouble me to the very depths of my soul.  Since my soul is not very deep, I will discuss it here.

Some years ago in places, that for lack of a better word I will refer to as retail, a new semantic trend gained some steam.  To indicate to the next person in line that it was ok for them to approach the register, the cashiers would no longer say “next in line” or even its abbreviated form, “next”.  Instead, the phrase “following guest” started to become popular.  I think it goes without saying, since I am now sitting here writing about it, that I hate that phrase.  It seemed to be, in my limited perspective on things, a sentence that meant nothing to the situation.  Despite my aggravation with this, it became the phrase of choice everywhere I went, seemingly.

As if this were not bad enough, a transition has begun to take place more recently.  I noticed it some time ago at Best Market and have heard it on a few other isolated occasions.  To further demean the general public and promulgate the de-humanizing of the patrons of these establishments, I am no longer the “following guest”, but instead have been demoted to just “following”.  What does that even mean?  I understand that if your job calls for you to say that dozens of times in the day, you may cut corners where you can.  I would greatly appreciate it, however, if those that occupy these positions could at least pretend not to hate me and not see me solely as a walking inconvenience and irritant, but a human being, customer and a fellow traveler on this journey of life… Ok, that was a bit over the top.  But in my defense, so is referring to the next person in line as “following”.